Week 5 Story: The Three Sheltered Ones

Long ago, I lived in a strange, clear box. There were other people in there with me, and we had many of the giant two-legged ones as servants. I lived in fear of King Mittens, our cruel leader. He lived at the top of the carpet tower, watching us always, as we went about our days and nights. He laid claim to all of our rattle mice, all of our fuzzy puff balls, and every toilet box, and he was always the first to greet our visitors, an ever-changing assortment of the two-legged ones who would come through and, on occasion, rescue one of our people from King Mittens’ tyranny.

One day, a new two-legged one came to the great box. It had gentle forepaws as it played with us. King Mittens tried to take its attention, but it also showed favor toward Silky, my countryman with the long fur, and to me. But the time came for it to leave, and it couldn’t decide which of us to take. It left alone, as it came.

Immediately, we began to squabble.

“Oh, great two legged one! Come back for me!” Our king wailed. He snatched something up from the floor and shook his paw in our faces. “See, for I have the two leg’s fur adornment! I am the chosen one!” He held a small circular object, which he took to the glorious water-giver and rinsed before bringing it back to his throne.

Silky grumbled in irritation. “Our king has become delusional. I will bring the two leg back to us.” She retreated to the corner of the great box, plotting.

I yowled in despair and settled down by the yawning portal, now closed, that the two legs came and went through. One day, I was sure, this two-leg would return, and I vowed not to move from my place until it did.

Many days passed. King Mittens cared for the fur adornment daily, rinsing it in the blessed waters at all hours. I hadn’t moved form my post, not even to eat- I relied on the two leg servants to bring food to me. And thus we stayed stagnant in our habits.

Silky, on the other hand, had been watching and plotting, and one day, she unleased her plan. She noticed that the loud ones on the other side of the portal would often be taken to another great box when they were injured, and, soon after they disappeared back through the portal, we would watch them walk out the great clear portal with a new two legged one. She used this information to do the same- she walked around favoring one of her paws until one of the servants took her to the other box. I watched, curious, as the two legs in that box fussed over her, flashing lights at her and looking at her foot. She returned to us with a bandaged paw the next day, triumphant.

“The two leg will return within a few days, I am sure.” She said as she passed my post. I doubted her, but despite this, I felt almost hopeful.

Indeed, the next day, the two leg came back. It had shorter head-fur now, and I almost didn’t recognize it- two legs look so similar, after all- but as soon as I did, I bounded up to it, rubbing its legs and crying out. “Take me, oh great one! Take me!”

It glanced toward Silky, who was climbing up the carpet tree- attempting a coup, perhaps?- and King Mittens, who slept, unaware, on his throne, before turning back to me. It bent down and said something in the gibberish language of the two legs.

“Are you taking me?” I asked.

“Tax benefits waffles.” It spoke our language as badly as most two legs as it lifted me up into its arms. I purred in happiness as it carried me through the yawning portal. I was rescued.

“Boring!” the goblin said as I finished my story. “You lie, our great two leg would never bring home a commoner.”

I glared at the goblin. “Oh, and you’re so special because our great two leg got you from another great two leg? Please.” I bopped him on the nose and clambered up the carpet tree. My carpet tree, greater than King Mittens could ever dream.

Our protagonist, waiting by the door (Source)

Author’s Note:

I based this story of “The Three Lovers” (Source), one of the stories from 22 Goblins. In the original story, the three suitors of a young woman mourn her death differently. Eventually, one brings her back to life with magic- which I recreated with Silky’s ploy to pretend to be injured (the implication being that a picture of her was posted on social media for the cat shelter while she was with the vet)- but the woman ends up marrying the man who slept in the cemetery by her ashes every night.

I made the three suitors into cats living in a shelter, and the young woman is represented by the human who eventually adopts our main cat. Mittens represents the man in the original story who washes the woman’s bones in the holy river (symbolized with him washing the human’s hair tie in the water dish), while Silky is the magician and the POV cat is the man who sleeps in the cemetery, as she sleeps in the last place that the human was seen.

I tried to talk about things the way a cat would- “portal” instead of “door”, “two legs” instead of “humans”, and “loud ones” instead of “dogs”, to name a few examples- while also using some words that make it somewhat obvious that the characters are cats- like “paw”, “fur”, “yowling” and “purring”, all words that are used mostly to refer to animals, and cats specifically.

The goblin at the end of the story is a callback to the source of the original story, although in this case, the goblin is the story-listener rather than the story-teller. In my mind, the goblin is a fancy hairless cat, purchased from a breeder- hence its elitist attitude to the so-called “commoner” cat from the shelter. The human’s speech of “tax benefits” is from a popular internet meme, about how cats probably hear humans’ meowing as jumbled cat words, the example given being “tax benefits”.